What I've learned from one night in Brooklyn

Park Slope brownstones are fabulous (inside and out), I still love Williamsburg and now the wonderful garden at a bar called Miss Williamsburg, For the first time in my life I wish I wasn't WASP-like, Why does every guy I know in NY have an "Asian thing" or an "Indian thing" ? I am not that smart and I wish I had more of an interest in politics or the Yankees so I could join more conversations, A guy I know who writes for the NYTimes (and was RECRUITED for the job) had never even picked up/read the Times before he worked there--just kill me now, already. Apparently I have a "New York" look and others feel this qualifies me for working at a department store (?), Because I am comfortable commenting on the attractiveness of other women, certain men assume I'm a lesbian, or at least "suprised that i don't kiss girls," Mojitos are fucking incredible, and I think I'm going to make it my signature summer drink..