Moving, Dead, or Dying

Apparently these are the three things necessary to qualify to terminate a yearlong commitment to the New York Sports Club. Utter bullshit. I went down to figure out the situation and speak with the general manager myself and after telling her that i'm just broke due to unforseen circumstances and can no longer afford the luxury of the gym membership, she told me that I had to prove I was moving by bringing in a lease, a bill with the new address, a letter from my current employer saying I was moving and/or switching jobs elsewhere, or a note from my doctor saying that I couldn't exercise due to medical reasons. OR i could transfer the membership over to a friend or family member who CAN pay for it on my behalf. I'm going to dig through some old papers/bills tonight to see if i have anything from my old Alabama address (though the date would probably give me away) or I am going to ask bosslady to actually craft a fake letter on our letterhead with her signature stating that I'm moving. Perhaps this will be a good indicator for her to realize I am underpaid. That's very unlikely.